A New Year, An Old Tradition

Every year around this time, people begin to reflect back over the last year and look ahead to the year unknown. They look over the days and months gone by and think: Did I use my time wisely? Did I spend correctly? Did I make good choices? Did I move forward? To all of these, I feel I can say yes. 2011 was a year of taking chances for me. It began as a year of tough decisions, panic, at times, desperation. My soul ached for a new path. Then, something happened that forced everything to change. That something was the day before my birthday last year. Few people know this, but last year, right before my birthday, a lawyer I had been working for flipped out on me. He told me I had ruined his presentation (those of you who know the whole story know that I ruined nothing for anyone that has been online for more than a year). After this experience something in me broke. I knew at that point that if a person I had been willing to call friend could make me feel that way in my workplace, that I would never be the same in that workplace again. I had known for some time that was not the job for me, but in this moment it became evident that the time I would spend in that position was coming to an end. It was that, or I would be devoured by it.

I decided that the change I had been mulling over and telling people I was thinking about doing was an imperative change. This became the new focus; the new goal and something to look forward to. It gave a timeline to the rest of my time at the firm, which made it bearable to continue pushing forward every day. My friends at work who knew (and they were few) were very supportive. They would ask how plans were coming along, and what the progress was on all the aspects. They all thought good thoughts for me for the week I spent with my parents at camp, knowing that was the week I'd be telling them that their baby girl was going to really fly away. I had everything set by that point, including a departure date, a plan for moving my belongings and 10 days in between to spend with the people I love in Southern Ontario. The change, of course, was moving to Spain to become a TEFL Certified Teacher. At no time have I felt like teaching is really the purpose for this, or the challenge in it. I know I can teach- I've done it before. The challenge for me was to start a new path, have some adventures, meet some new people, to shake things up and really be comfortable in myself in an unfamiliar place. I needed a change in culture to appreciate my own. I have a list, with my best friend, of Things To Do Before I Die. The purpose of this trip is to make some of those wishes come true. No one in life is going to make anything happen for you, but you.

Earning a (second) Certificate or degree - check
Live in another country for at least 3 months- check
Visit Paris-check
Have Only 5 Things I Can't Live Without- check
Visit Spain- check
Learn Spanish- working on it

There are other small accomplishments I've achieved since being here, but they cannot be refelcted upon in the same manner as the things already mentioned here. They are the changes of my spirit and soul, the growth of courage and perserverance.

I have no idea what is to come in 2012, but I can say that I would like to take what I have learned and accomplished in 2011 and push forward into the future. I am by no means in a place of understanding what my life is going to look like in the coming months and years. If anything, things are murkier than before, but I have faith that whatever is coming will only help me to be a better, stronger, more successful, understanding person. I have hopes of being able to give my time to help other people again in the future, so hopefully this year will be another step towards that.

Happy New Year to all my loved ones around the world, new and old. I wish you health, happiness and adventure this year!